new beginnins


The above word has taken on a whole new meaning for me of late. For example...

Last night at IAO Gallery, I witnessed silent tragedy. On shelves, there were jars. [glass jars.] The jars contained wings. [of birds.] It hurt me to look at this depressing spectacle - I instantly felt pain in my gut upon seeing them.

A scene flashed into my mind at this encounter :: Picture the birds, the ones whose wings were encased on a shelf, high above their reach... Think of their invisible prison, barring them in from reaching any of the heights they know instinctively they're intended to reach, but can't articulate the right questions to ask in order to get there. Trapped unaware, they live. Pieces of their very being are hidden away from grasp...or knowledge of an ability to grasp.

Some of these wingless aviaries will live the majority of their lives resigned to do as they're told...to believe the nay-sayers of flight when they say, "It's not your place, little one. You were meant for the ground."

Travesty has officially hit - we are no longer 'allowed' to do what we were meant to do.

A bluebird discovers a door behind a bookcase. With assistance from loyal friends, she advances past the books and passes through the door - she witnesses a piece of herself, tucked into a corner shelf.

The rest is history, still being made.

So this is art - some people get it, some people don't. That's ok, though... [maybe you weren't meant to.] Regardless, it's vital to my soul -- expression of life/death, joy/pain, abundance/lack.

Everything gets sorted out in time (which may or may not exist as we think it does). The journey from now to later will yield beauty...progress will show her work... God will do his thang...and my joy will praise him, his name praised will satisfy me, my satisfaction in him will tell on my being, thereby praising his name...and the circle continues, mutually beneficial.

We're all in this together, people. Don't make things harder than they already are.


love over fear

The art of convincing is a tricky one. There's manipulation, there's preaching, there's the friendly nudge, there's heartfelt imploring, and more I won't try to think of right now.

More and more, as I am exposed to deeper, bigger, and more...um...colorful [yes - perfect word] sides of life, I see that love is a POWERFUL motivator. Who wants your Bible and your church when they can have LOVE, anyway?

To be told that who one is isn't good enough implies that the person spoken to can do something about their goodness. And still you say, from the other side of your mouth, "There is none righteous, no, not one."

Every time someone tells me they never want to see another Christian again, I feel heated...my sinuses burn, eyelids fill, heart falls. W h a t . H a v e . W e . D o n e ...?

(((The above eight sentences are what currently motivate me to keep burning, because...even an angry passion, when funneled into decisive action, can set mountains of pride ablaze, with all their flippant disregard turned back-ward falling embers, whose glow can't help but enter, disappearing, into our memories as nothing BUT. God meant so much more for this planet --- guess what, hands and feet? You don't know your own strength. Will you rend us away from Love, or will you pull us toward? We long for HOME: a place to come and be embraced for who we were MADE TO BE...to be protected, be fed, given rest. We are building these homes, staggering friends with music, and music with prayer; on-the-job injuries were inevitable from the beginning. If you can do nothing but tie down our hands and force us to watch our almost-homes crumble beneath your wrecking ball, then please: go play in the sandbox; those castles were meant to fall.)))



So! it's off. Been thinking about it for a long time...since last summer, as a matter of fact. My hair hasn't been this short since I was about 11, and at that time it was stick straight. Puberty worked its miracles around 18.5ish years of age and *poof!* my head is now a bunch of chocolate curls. It's been fun working with, experimenting with... People say you can't do as much with short hair - I beg to differ. There are a lot of things you can do with short which are impossible with long. Anyways, I am liking it short.

I am also liking being excited. Getting started on [possibly] creating a business... Funny, cuz the guy I'm dating is SUPER good at business. Yay! We'll see how things go. I'd be making clothes, jewelry, accessories, etc...stuff I've been doing since I was a little kid. And now it's coming to a head...awesomeness.

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